Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Having a random hookup so left but love u
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
