I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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