i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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