no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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