This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Randomize
