Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
