Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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