Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
