He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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