Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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