I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
