He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
