I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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