I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
