Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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