At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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