oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
