You're so nebulous sometimes
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Randomize