that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
