it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
