We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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