I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
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