I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Randomize
