But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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