Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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