Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
