Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Randomize
