if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize