Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
