I didn't shave. On purpose
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
