we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
