the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
