Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
