so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
