Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Randomize