I didn't shave. On purpose
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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