Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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