how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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