It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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