you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
