i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
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