i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
