Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Randomize
