Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Randomize
