She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
