I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
