Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
