he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
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