I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
