remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
